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Wednesday, June 19, 2013

A Lesson in Mommyhood

As I have said many times, this blog is a record of my journey through life so I can remember what happens, since time flies by. I have to record this conversation immediately so I don't forget the words.

Ava and I playing house while everyone else was at worship night:

Ava: Mommy, do you want to play house with me?

Me: Sure Ava.

Ava: Ok, you are the girl and I am the mommy. Ok?

Me: Ok.

Ava: I am going to put you to bed. (putting blankets on me.) Good night! I am going to sleep over here in my room.

Me: Mommy! Mommy! I need you, I'm scared! (reenacting a typical night in our house.)

Ava: It's ok honey, what's wrong, what happened?

Me: I had a bad dream, I want you.

Ava: Oh, it's ok. You know what I'm going to do? I am going to pray for you, ok? Jesus, please help Caite sleep with no dreams and help her to calm down so she can be happy tomorrow. In Jesus name, Amen. Ok, do you feel better? I can sleep right here next to you tonight if that makes you feel better.

Me: Ok mommy, I love you.

Ava: Ok, it's morning time!

Me: I don't feel good mommy, can you take care if me?

Ava: Yes, I am going to pray for you. Jesus, please heal her so she feels better so we can have a fun day tomorrow at the beach. Amen. Ok,I am going to get you some remedies. Ok, there you go, do you feel better?

Me: Yes mommy, thank you.

This game of role reversals went on for another hour quite similarly. I was sick, she would take care of me so sweetly. I would build a tower of blocks and she would take pictures and videos of me on the IPhone. She folded the laundry and I put them in piles. We mirrored our everyday life, but just with her doing my job and me doing her part.

But the cool thing about tonight is God uses the ordinary, everyday things to give us revelations and open our eyes. God gave me a few beautiful gems that I would have never noticed without Him.

1) Even though some days seem like my kids don't here a single word I say, they talk through me saying bedtime prayers, they scream in my face when I tell them they can't do something,even when all this happens, they still hear me. She said the exact things I say to her, "let me pray for you," "let me get you a remedy," "let me take a picture of you." When she is being mommy, she says the words she remembers mommy saying.

2) When I first pretended I was scared after she put me to bed, I was being silly to show her how she sounds sometimes. But for a split second before she opened her mouth to comfort me, I was afraid. I was afraid she would mimic me in a different way. If she said, "you're fine, go to sleep, do not get up again," she would have been just as accurate. That made me sad... Sometimes conviction hurts.

3) Several times this week we have discussed treating others how you want to be treated, and tonight my tiny girl showed that to me. She was so sweet and loving and kind. She was patient and gentle to her "little girl." She showed me how she wanted to be treated as a child.

I was so in awe of this little creature. This child who can go from laughing to punching in seconds, who feels everything in life 100%, who is so unpredictably volatile sometimes I wonder how she will get through the next 15 years of school. This baby girl was being the sweetest mama I wish that I could be daily.

I could feel guilty for the way I act sometimes, I could wish I was the perfect mom, but I'm not going to do either of those things. I am going to take tonight as the sweet, precious gem of a reminder that it is. A reminder that God can allow them to remember the good and forget the bad. And, that the lessons I am trying to teach my children can be taught me in even more clarity then I have been able to teach them. I learned a lesson in being a mom tonight from my little girl. Thank you Lord for allowing these beautiful lessons to come from the mouths of babes.

The father (mother) of godly children has cause for joy. What a pleasure to have children who are wise. (Proverbs 23:24 NLT)

 

Friday, June 7, 2013

Discerning the Voice of God: All in His Timing

Time flies by. I should start keep tracking of how many times I have said that on this blog. But it does! Summer is almost here, my baby is almost finished with first grade, all of my babies are about to be another year older, and I feel like I just had them yesterday. So I must document everything so that I don't forget in the busyness of life.

With all that life brings and all the distractions pulling for my time, it is easy to get lost and not hear what the Lord is saying. Thankfully, God knows this about me. With three kids, an impending move, homeschooling, church, sports, cleaning (like that happens), and everything else, God knew I needed something to focus my attention on. Several weeks ago, He lead me to be involved in a morning Bible study at our church. The topic: Discerning the Voice of God. Which couldn't have been more perfect (go figure) with all the changes coming my way. I started this study excitedly anticipating what God had to show me, and true to His character, He has blown me away more then I could have ever hoped for. Every. Single. Day. Every word. They are gems. It's unbelievable how perfect the timing is with small and large events occurring in my life. It is interesting to me how I am still surprised when the Lord lines things up so perfectly. You'd think I would get it after He has revealed this to me so many wonderful times! But really, the synchronization of this study and our planning is perfect, just like Him. :-) God...why are you good to us?!

 

The thing that struck me so strongly today is His timing. So many times in my life I have heard the whisper in my ear, "Hurry. Hurry! If you wait the (house, job, car, insert-word-here) will be gone. Dont wait for confirmation, just do it. Now!" The pressure-sometimes internal, sometimes external. The feeling that nothing as good as this will come along. Well, if any of you have ever felt that feeling, get ready for some freedom my friend. Look at this...

"Discerning the Voice of God," Priscilla Shirer

That is the enemy, not the Lord! Yes, God will sometimes speak to you in urgency, but it will never be demeaning or negative. He will never rush you without confirmation and peace. He will lovingly lead you to the decision that best works for His plan for you, His plan for the world, and His plan to glorify Himself. How comforting, freeing, and awesome is that! You never again have to worry if you are making the right decision or if you need to hurry and decide. If He hasn't given you peace, it's not the time to make that decision. God is so good to us, to guide His people individually. If you have decisions coming up that you have not yet heard the Lord's voice in, keep this in mind. And it doesn't matter if they are big or small, He wants to guide you in all of them.

Thank you Lord! Please let us remember that each decision is in Your timing, not ours! You see our life spread out before us like only you can. You are coordinating all the events in your time, place, and circumstance. We thank you Lord for you attention to detail in our small, individual lives. We don't deserve that, yet You bless us with it. Thank you Gracious Lord!

"There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven...a time to be silent and a time to speak." Ecclesiastes 3:1,7