When you become a Christian, you start the process of changing who you are and how you respond to life. For some it is an instant change in every area and for others it is a more gradual change in different departments of our lives. However you end up doing it, you probably still remember how you were before. Have you ever had the thought, "The old me would have done...(fill in the blank)...in this situation." I still have it all the time. As you all know, my most recent change has come in the housekeeping department. It is not the most spiritual thing in the world, but it is something that had to happen. I have always struggled with being a tidy person, and after being frustrated all the time I finally asked Someone to help me with this area. I asked for God to give me a better attitude about cleaning, extra energy to use on keeping up the house, and a tireless spirit. So imagine my surprise when this actually happened! (I don't know why I am always so astonished when God gives me the desires of my heart-Psalms 37:4 :-) It is the most surreal feeling. In my mind I think, "I normally would be tired right now....I normally would be sitting down wasting time right now...I normally would walk by those toys on the floor and now I am picking them up." It's like someone else is controlling my brain but I am okay with it. That sounds kind of weird, but it's like having a different mind, or being a different person, but yet still me. Okay, I am having a hard time describing it, probably because it is so amazing/weird/awesome! And this isn't the first time it has happened to me. The first time it happened, I had rededicated my life to the Lord. I was trying to do everything he wanted me to do. But I had something I was holding on to, something I just ignored. My relationship with my mother-in-law was not doing well (and that is a huge understatement!). It was wearing on my marriage, my emotions, and my relationship with the Lord. I did not want to give this up, but God broke me down and I humbly gave that relationship over to Him. From that point on, I had this strange calm disposition when it came to her. Things that I would have blown up about in the past, I let roll off my back. And I remember thinking, "I should be getting mad right now...but I'm not. Weird." It was such a freeing feeling! This peace that came from trusting the Lord and asking for a life change, it was surreal and marvelous! Peace that passes understanding. I now know exactly what this means! I couldn't completely understand it. I could only know that God did it, and He did it for me. Now my relationship with my mother-in-law is great! It's not perfect (because nobody is) but it is very enjoyable. And she is very proud of my for how far I have come in my cleaning ;-)
My inspiration for today is Phillipians 4:7 "And the peace of God, that passes all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds on Christ." Also inspiring, the song "Joy Down in My Heart." Do you remember that one? In particular the section that says, "I have the peace that passes understanding down in my heart, where! Down in my heart, where! Down in my heart. I have the peace that passes understanding down in my heart, where! Down in my heart to stay!" It's one of the Balderas Family Fav's.
Have you experienced this feeling, or am I the only one? I would love to hear your experience (so I know I'm not crazy ;-) Peace and Love...
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